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Relationship Advice | What To Do When Your Love Life Takes A Break

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Hitting the pause button on your love life doesn’t have to mean also putting your life on hold.

When you’re in a serious relationship that has weathered through every storm and has stood the test of time, you begin to feel assured that you and your partner will never part. Yet, life has a different plan. An issue then comes up that rocks the relationship and almost destroys the love between the two of you. And now, the healthiest option is to take a break from each other.

Stepping away to cool off may feel scary and seem like a weird space to navigate in, but the experience can be made easier to handle when you know what to do.

In this list, we offer relationship advice for men and women who may be in a temporary separation at the moment. This will help you focus on what you can do during such a troubled time.

  1. When the ball drops and your partner asks for space away from you, shock may be one of the first things you feel. However, through all of this, make a conscious effort to take care of yourself.
  2. Eat properly and make sure to stay hydrated. You can even treat yourself with a calming bath or anything to keep you calm and soothed.

  3. When it sinks in, welcome all of your emotions — even the ones you may consider ugly and negative. In fact, anger, hurt, fear and guilt are normal and healthy human responses to a stressor.
  4. Feel all your feelings. Let them be and let them flow. Ignoring them will only set you up to explode at a later, and possibly more dangerous, time.

  5. Just because your partner is the one to ask for a break doesn’t mean that you have no say on things. Before you part, agree on a set of ground rules — what are acceptable as well as things to avoid while you are away from each other.
  6. These may include agreement on fidelity, appropriate interactions with others, contact between each other, and other matters that involve the two of you — the place, the financial responsibilities, the children, and even pets.

  7. This may be a dark and challenging time for you, but never forget that there are still others who love and will care for you. Look around for your family and friends and accept their support.
  8. Your healing can also come from activities that give you a sense of safety and normalcy, including books, music, movies or hobbies. Whomever and whichever you prefer to spend time with, realize that you are never alone.

  9. One of the worst things you can do at this point is to try and predict the outcome. Depending on how you feel at any given moment, you may see a happy resolution or a depressing future.
  10. Stay in the present and base your reactions and actions on what is truly happening now and not from an imagination.

  11. There are various reasons for your partner calling it off for a while. And whatever these may be, ensure that you learn from the separation and strive to become better as a partner. This is not to say that you are solely at fault, but recognize and take responsibility for the role you play in a partnership. Everyone should grow in love.

No one ventures into love just to prepare for a break. However, it does happen — and when it does, take these reminders, along with all of your accumulated love and relationship advice columns, to find strength and clarity at this bleak time. Always remember to keep returning to what you can control and can do.

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